A physician claimed
that the following are actual comments made by his (predominately male)
patients while he was performing their colonoscopies:
“Take it easy, Doc. You’re boldly going where no man has gone before!”
“Find Amelia Earhart yet?”
“Can you hear me NOW?”
“Are we there yet?! Are we there yet? Are we there yet?”
“You know, in Arkansas, we’re now legally married.”
“Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?”
“You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out…”
“Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!”
“If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit!”
“Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.”
“You used to be an Enron executive, didn’t you?”
“God, now I know why I am not gay.”
And the best one of
all…
“Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?”
Cowboy Lines That
Have Been Ruined.. Top Ten Old West
Phrases That Will Never Sound The Same After Brokenback Mountain
- "I'm gonna pump you fulla lead!"
- "Give me a stiff one, barkeep!"
- "Don't fret---I've been in tight spots before."
- "Howdy, pardner."
- You stay here while I sneak around from behind."
- Two words: "Saddle Sore."
- "Hold it right there! Now, move your hand, reeeal slow-like."
- "Let's mount up!"
- "Nice spread ya got there!"
- "Ride'em cowboy!"